Some Effective Traits Of Working Moms

Working mothers have been argued over in the parenting world for decades, and the charge is always the same one: that they are not there. There are things that make them a distinctive kind of parent, and they are worth setting out.

Some mothers choose to stay at home and take the traditional role. Others prefer to work outside it and live life at full stretch. Choosing between the two, most mothers are weighing what is best for their children rather than what is easiest for themselves.

And some choose both, pursuing a career while raising well brought up children. Here is what that gives the children.

A positive role model, for both the daughters and the sons

Children need to understand early that women are not household staff, and that a woman may have a professional life of her own.

The effect divides usefully. Girls learn that a career is something to think about, rather than assuming the path runs straight from marriage to children. Boys learn that domestic work is part of family life and not somebody else’s department.

That second one matters longer than people expect. It shapes how those boys run their own households years later.

More independent children

A working mother is out of the house for much of the day and tends to carry guilt about it.

What the children see is different from what she fears. They know their mother is impressive and that she handles every front effectively. So they get on with their own chores and do not lean on anyone to do it for them.

The independence is not a consolation prize for the absence. It is produced by it.

Better quality time, because it is deliberate

Everybody talks about quality time with children. The sad fact is that a great many parents are only half listening while they are with their children, because the other half is attached to a device.

A working mother knows she has to switch off the moment she gets home, and that the hours she does have need all of her attention.

Which is the quiet point underneath this whole argument. Presence is not measured in hours in the building. It is measured in whether anyone is actually listening.